Tuesday, May 10, 2011
When It Rains It Pours
Stringbean went in for surgery for Lung Cancer Saturday, they called me later to tell me that when they went in that the cancer was too attached to her lungs and esophagus, and felt it was too high of a risk to try to remove. She is almost 12, a very spry 12, they took a biopsy, the results come back next week, though no matter what they tell us, I am not willing to put her through Chemo or Radiation. So I will just keep her home and make sure she is comfy when it gets rough, until I feel that the quality of her life is becoming painful or below what I would want for my best friend, We will make the decision to let her go.
Quality means more to me than Quantity, You don’t really understand that until you have had a sick animal and have had to make the right choice at the right time, you learn your lesson on what you should have done, or what you did out of your own selfish needs. We as humans are not trained in how to make these decisions, It's not natural for us to decide on ending a life of a living thing, and living with that.
It's been a rough 2 Months, I almost lost my Mother to a stroke, Lost Jelly unexpectedly, Part of me feels like I’m getting old and everything I love is dying. I know It's just pages in my life being turned, But I can’t help feeling like the best part of my life is over, when I was modeling and traveling and everyone I loved was healthy and fine. Such as life… Live it the way you want before It's over.